We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize