he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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