before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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