Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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