I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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