there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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