I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
