it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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