Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
