Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
And then he peed in my hair
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