Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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