But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
You took a bar mat shot.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
