They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Damn victory sex feels great
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
