you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Bring me that man meat
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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