A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
