i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
