i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
