So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Terrible idea I love it
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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