Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
