I'm drive I can fine osifer
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
