8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Randomize
