The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
