My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
