I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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