marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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