Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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