what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Randomize
