I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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