just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
