Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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