Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
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