oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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