You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
