Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
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