i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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