So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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