are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
