we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
