i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
handjob tips. give me some.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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