Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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