I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
