im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
