There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
