idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
