After last night, I could never be a politician.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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