it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize