he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize