I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
