Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
