My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
