So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
